Jimmy Steal

Much like how we sometimes see the clouds merge into one in the sky, or more appropriately, the bubbles on the head of his beloved Miller Lite, Gott’s tattoos seem to all blend together. So, how many tats does your boy really have? I did a deep dive to find out!

When it comes to his body, let alone his tattoos, Gotts of the Morning Rat Race, is like an artistic science project. He drinks a ton of “beers” as he calls them. He eats like total shit. I don’t mean red meat and fried foods, no, I mean Combos and a Mountain Dew for lunch regularly. Yet the bastard is thin as a rail. He dyes his hair and grows dreadlocks, yet it never falls out. His math skills or lack thereof are legendary, yet his brain always remembers the digits of the girl he’s trying to pick up at the bar. He truly is a modern medical wonder. His freakish powers must come from those colorful designs on his epidermal canvas.

Lucky for me, it’s only the upper torso I have to focus on.

If the Gotts has any leg tattoos, I haven’t seen them. If he has any “hidden” ink, I don’t wanna see ’em! For this exercise, we will be focusing on his arms. Ah the arms, those toothpicks have more drawings on them than Green Day’s Dookie album cover. His arms are going to be the toughest to count correctly. A lot of blending, melding, and bad late-night decisions for sure.

Gotts has themes in his tattoos…I think.

His one arm is an under-the-sea motif. Honestly, as I was taking these photographs I had to have him explain what some of them were. The artwork is top-notch, no doubt. However, a few of them left me scratching my head as to what creatures they actually were. One kind of looks like Don Rickles. The other arm we’ll call his “personal collection”. I have no other name for it. Trees, tiki heads, some blonde chick. It’s a Forrest Gump on an acid trip with Captain Dan-type situation for sure.

The final count?

Hard to say. Two pieces, one on each arm. 15 total individual tattoos counted, but that’s not including the background shading and other colors flowing through. I’ll stick with 15. It’s a nice round number if you’re doing Gotts math.

  • OCTOPUS

    OCTOPUS

  • JELLYFISH 1

    JELLYFISH 1

  • JELLYFISH 2

    JELLYFISH 2

  • HAMMERHEAD SHARK

    HAMMERHEAD SHARK

  • SEA URCHIN...I think.

    SEA URCHIN

  • WE FOUND NEMO AND DORY!

    NEMO AND DORY

  • EEL

    EEL

  • I'M NO ANGEL FISH

    ANGEL FISH

  • DEEP SEA DIVER

    DEEP SEA DIVER

  • TIKI FACE 1

    TIKI FACE 1

  • TREE OF LIFE

    TREE OF LIFE

  • RANDOM BLONDE CHICK

    BLONDE

  • TIKI FACE 2

    TIKI FACE 2

  • HIBISCUS FLOWER

    HIBISCUS FLOWER

  • VOLCANO

    VOLCANO

  • Put 'em all together and this is what you get!

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