Breaking Out The Crayons For The No Sweat News Quiz
Can you tell which story is fake? It’s a tricky one today because the fake story is pretty similar to a real story.
Dateline, Florida for story number 1. The Capitol of the No Sweat News gets the year off to a good start when two home robbers called 911 in the middle of their crime. They didn’t say anything so cops traced the call and showed up, just in case. When they arrived one of the criminals asked the police if they could help out with a ride with all this stuff they had recently aquired. Actually, the police did give them a ride… back to the police station because it was clear what was going on. Moral of the story? Cops as your getaway car. That’s a new one.
That’s story number one, now known as: Love it when a plan comes together, but that didn’t happen here.
And it’s dateline Italy for story number two. A husband had hidden he and his wife’s life savings in their chimney, but he didn’t tell her. Well, he should have told her because over the Christmas holiday – while he was out – she thought it might be nice to have a roaring fire… and she toasted the entire thing. He’s hoping that the government bonds can be replaced with a proof of purchase. Moral of the story: And he’s hoping he can sleep somewhere other than the couch soon.
That’s story number 2, now known as: Under the floor boards, in the mattress, or in the bird cage…
And our 3rd story for today’s No Sweat News Quiz takes us to: Louisiana.
The Pelican State has become the first in the nation to offer a drivers license modification notifying any arresting authority that the person is licensed to view or create adult content. Most state’s current drivers licenses have an “M” for MOTORCYLE or “L” for if the holder requires corrective LENSES. The new “A” drivers license endorsement in Louisianna will denote licensed to view or create adult content for things like Only Fans or Porn Hub Amateur. It costs 75 dollars in training and licensing fees to obtain. Moral of the story? Oh, I can teach that training. Yep, qualified right here.
That’s story number three, now known as: I’m surprised New Jersey didn’t think of this way to fleece the general public…
And last but least, story number four for today’s No Sweat News Quiz: dateline Seattle. A computer programmer just got busted syphoning bits of shipping costs off every purchase at Zulily dot com. The dude got away with 260,000 bucks before being nabbed. If it sounds familiar it’s because it’s the same exact scam that was in the movie, “Office Space”. Just no Jennifer Aniston or guy with the stapler. Moral of the story. I was gonna do the same thing with toilet paper during the pandemic. My plan was to take a few sheets from every new roll of TP. I’d make a small fortune.
That’s story number 4, now known as: Can we get a minute to consider Jennifer Aniston around that time?
