It’s Page Nine…with East Side Dave
(95.9 The Rat’s parody of sleezy celebrity gossip websites)
Oh MY, dear readers! Things are heating up between this scandalous Ben Affleck-Jennifer Lopez-Alex Rodriguez love triangle! Or should we call it…a love square?!
It seems that Affleck and J-Lo are hot and heavy and totally back together! Sources say Affleck hasn’t been this close to someone since he leached off Matt Damon to win an Oscar for Good Will Hunting!
Ben is so smitten, he’s taken to wearing a nearly twenty-year-old watch that J. Lo gave him in 2002…which is a good thing as Ben will know exactly what time it is when Jennifer ditches his ass again!
Ben Affleck appears to wear watch Jennifer Lopez gifted him in 2002 https://t.co/pWluUAmoO7 pic.twitter.com/vqNe3qwFeY
— Page Six (@PageSix) May 24, 2021
As for A-Rod…..he’s apparently moving on from “Jenny from the Block” and into the arms of a younger blonde who apparently calls him “The Big Boss”! Yowza!
Wow! Big Boss?! I hope A-Rod’s ego doesn’t get as inflated as his biceps! It seems he’s been getting injections…of LOVE!!
This has been another edition of Page Nine! And remember, dear readers, to keep it on the QT…and very hush-hush!
– East Side Dave